About Sak Mo Dee
Born in the mountain ranges of Tibet into a quiet order of ninja monks, Sak Mo Dee – or “The Greatest Ninja Of All Time” as he came to be known – spent the greater part of his childhood immersed in hot water pools with ugly monkeys meditating upon the wise words and philosophical musings of Buddha, Barry Manilow and Celine Dion.
When he wasn’t being steamed with the monkeys, the young Sak Mo would run around the monastery playing amusing childhood pranks on the elderly monks – putting sharp nails and razors in their beds, poisoning their soup, polluting the only water supply to their building and sneaking up behind them during quiet moments of meditation and reflection and pushing them off cliffs to be dashed on the rocks below.
But the childhood merriment and innocent fun was soon to end…
One dark night the idyllic monastery of the ninja monks was razed by a vicious horde of Martian Robot Dinosaurs. [Story temporarily removed pending ongoing negotiation for movie rights].
The next day, Sak Mo Dee was bundled into the back of a small cart with only his PSP and the entire financial worth of the humble monastery (45 million dollars) and sent off into the great wide world by the kindly elder – Ee Ping Pee – who’d raised him. As the cart trundled off down the road on a fresh pair of 22s from the nearby Custom Auto, old Ee Ping Pee’s last words rang in young Sak Mo’s ears and would forever come fondly to mind during times of seachange in his life: “Oi! Where did you put the remote to the TV?!”
To be continued…
